The doggie decision

Shen do you make the choice?  Are you able to spend and spend to keep them breathing?  Are yo able to spend making them comfortable?   What can you do for a dying dog?
If I could would I save my dog to be miserable?  Just keep it living but no quality of life?  Who chooses what is quality and what is not?    Would I?  Would I keep my dog alive via surgeries or pills even if it made her sicker or healthy for a day.  I say her because this is the point in my life I am at with my little dog of almost 15 years old.   Harmony fit her name and brought that peace into my life.  She was my emotional support dog when she rode with me and I could pet her when I wanted.  When you have a dog who loves this then it is great.  Harmony was my Harmony in life. 

My dog is riddled with lumps and bumps.  We (meaning her Vet & I) are keeping her comfortable.  That was last week.

Our Vet showed me how to do a Calendar for good and bad days for my dog.  Friday was her last better day.  She is still hanging and following me and wants to be near but the eating is slowing almost to a stop.  She is drinking which is very important.

Now she just sleeps.  So when is the time?  We have our own thoughts on this but it is something we share if we have dogs that get old and sick.

We have been to the Vet and she perks up.  She is not fond of a table or a Vet.  

I saw friends dog died suddenly although he did have a kidney problem.  The owner said he was to blame and should not have taken him out.  The dog died at the vet.  Is it more sad when you get hit with it suddenly?  Is it more sad because I have to make the decision to kill my own dog?  I do not have that answer.  Did this person have to make the death decision for his dog because the quality of life for the dog was over.  I don't have that answer.  

It is never easy when you love dogs.  Never Easy.  I've gone through this many times for my entire life.  Making these choices and hoping and praying for the best.  Each time is never easier or the same.  

In my head I think that my little dog is ok and happy to be with me.  Or is it the other way around?  I am ok and happy to be with my little dog since we have done the same for almost 15 years.  

We are blessed that we can help our dogs out of this world.  At least that is what I tell myself because I would do anything for my little dog but there is nothing left to do.  I pray then that I am correct because tears are tears and start with this thought, this blog.  The thought of it is over is difficult but is the act of choosing to make it over harder?  

My last dog was so difficult as she was part of my life and this dog was part of hers and mine.  Maybe it is that an era is over so onto the new.  I will cry and hurt and my eyes will be reder than ever for a bit but I have my other dog who also needs me.   They give me purpose so I still have that.  I think if I did not I would foster the world.  Now I just train one at a time.

See just that little second of talking about saying goodbye helps.  

One more thing.  I see the sad posts and had friends and family who lost their beloved pets.  Everyone says so sorry and try's to console but only you the one who lost that pet knows the pain and will deal with it the best way you know how.

Decisions? 
Should I put my dog out of misery or pain?  Should I wait?  Should I try this new drug and how long to wait before I see if it works or not.  How much pain will my dog suffer before I help it? 
 
What do I do after?  Leave the body?  Cremate it? Take it home and bury it?  

It is the same if your dog goes suddenly.  The pain that is.